Saturday, July 22, 2017

Soldier Boyz (1995)

How bad is it? One of the worst-written soldier pics.
Should you see it? No.

Imagine "The Dirty Dozen" written by the guy who wrote "Big Momma's House" and starring Michael Dudikoff; that's actually what this is! Once again, some bigshot's daughter is kidnapped and a ragtag group is assembled to rescue her. This time the team, taken from prison, is a rapist and a psychopathic woman, a skinhead (with a swastika tattoo that was obviously hand-drawn magic marker) and minorities that don't get along... and all want to kill the retired army major (Dudikoff) - pretty much the worst team one could assemble (also, none have any training, but that gets taken care of in one day). No one, good or bad, uses weaponry that makes any sense, nor do they use them properly. No one acts in a way consistent with their established stereotype character (to be fair, they're supposed to have grown as people in this time). All of this could've made for a laughable film, but it's just tiresome.

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