Monday, June 11, 2018

The Prodigal Planet (1983)

aka A Thief in the Night 4: The Prodigal Planet, aka A Thief in the Night IV: The Prodigal Planet

This is the last of a four part series of Christian apocalyptic films and by far the longest, dullest and least seen of the four, which started in 1972. A guy escapes a guillotine, but I'm not sure how - everyone got distracted by a nuclear attack, I guess. A direct hit on Omaha by a nuke changes nothing (insert your own joke), leaving everything standing and all the trees green. A post-apocalyptic clothes shopping spree involves dancing "the robot" for no apparent reason. A disco version of "The William tell Overture" gets played incessantly. A large part of the film is devoted to cracking a code with numerology (the one who cracks it takes maybe 5 seconds), which gives a musical code to stop Russian warheads. The best line: "I find a boy and he's got a face like a burned marshmallow." Said boy converts to Christianity and immediately starts lecturing a woman on theology, though she grew up in the Church... which is truer than the filmmakers probably would like to admit. Mostly, though, it's quotes from the Revelation of St. John and bad acting. William Wellman Jr. is the only name in the cast.

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