Monday, March 2, 2015

Never Too Young to Die (1986)

How bad is it? It's a ridiculous timewaster of 1980's cliches.
Should you see it? Yes, for the cast, particularly Gene Simmon's perf.


George Lazenby plays a James Bond-type (remember "On Her Majesty's Secret Service?") that gets killed early by Gene Simmons (remember "KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park?") who plays a hermaphroditic rock-star super-criminal. Then Simmons plans to poison L.A.'s water supply with radiation, so he has to be stopped by secret agent Vanity (remember 1986?) and high school gymnast John Stamos ("Full House" was next year). Robert Englund plays a computer whiz. This ends up being a "Road Warrior" clone, like a thousand other films of the time, but the beyond-over-the-top performance by Simmons makes it worth seeing.

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